found two news ways to get protein

I was at Target today and saw this cereal which I saw advertised on tv a few times and thought i would give it a try. Ladies it is delish! It is very similar to granola. Of course I didn't put any milk in it, I haven't had cereal with milk since I have been banded. But this is really good. For 3/4 of a cup you get 9 grams of protein and 180 calories. I think this might be my new mid morning snack. I ate it in the car this morning, since I didn't have breakfast and it was 10:30 I new I needed something before going to church. It was really good.

The next wonderful find is something I came across on someones blog. It was an older blog one that hadn't been updated in like 9 months or something but she suggested taking some of the protein powder for shakes and mix it with a little bit of milk and then put it in your coffee. Now I bought some chocolate powder a long time ago I didn't really care for and I used that. I poured it into the coffee and it is soo good. It just gave it a little taste of chocolate not too much, but what I am more excited about is there is 20 grams of protein right there with my morning cup of java. I tell you the things that make me happy. Before my joy came from finding a 6th nugget from Wendys when I only ordered 5, but now it is all about getting my protein in.

life with restriction

So I figured it was fitting to show peanut butter as I have gotten stuck a few times today. But really the peanut

butter I found in Walmart and has 10 grams of protein for 2 tablespoons and 169 calories. It also has 4 grams of fiber. Much healthier than the regular jiffy I have been buying. Now there are flaxseeds in it but when you mix it up you don't really mind them. I had a couple of spoon fulls of this today to try and get some protein in.

I started off today with a cup of decaf and then at 9:30 I thought I would be ready for eggs. I made some scrambled eggs with cream cheese to make them creamy and reheated some mashed potatoes from yesterday. Let me tell you I had three bites and was done for another hour. I mean it just sat there for a while. By 11:45 I had finished my egg and given up on the mashed potatoes.

At 4:30 I figured I should eat again, wasn't hungry but knew I needed something. I took 2 bites of a tuna sub no bread of course. So it was really just tuna and cheese. Boy did that hurt. I spent 5 minutes over the toilet spitting, you know just tons of spit. Luckily no throw up I think leaning over helped to move it.

By 6:00 I managed to eat the tuna from half of the sub, and the cheese off of one slice of pizza. I couldn't resist. I also had 1/2 cup of sugar free pudding mixed with cool whip. I needed something sweet. That is all I have had all day. Even drinking is different, I can't drink too fast or too much because even that causes me to feel uncomfortable.

I am so glad for the restriction, but more than that I am happy I have no desire to eat. I mean when am I not hungry. I remember going out with my husband am him saying are you hungry and me saying when have I not been hungry. Well now I can say no. It is a wonderful feeling to have the thought of food out of my head.

My only worry is how am I going to get 60 grams of protein in? I really hate yogurt so please don't suggest that. Any other suggestions?

Listen to what my doctor said!

I had a fill yesterday and I figured I should ask her some questions I had. But before that let me tell you about my experience. The scale showed I only lost 4 pounds in the past month so I was pretty bummed about that. But I also did not exercise at all last month and made some bad food choices which probably explains that.

I told her I had some restriction but not enough to keep me eating more than I should be. She asked me the standard two questions "Can you eat bread?" and "Can you eat chicken" I told her yes to chicken and sometimes with bread. She gave me another cc. I drank the little cup of water after and told her I burped and asked if that was a problem she said as long as it went down you are ok. Nothing new with the fill, it did hurt a tad more than normal but not huge.

Ok so now to what she told me. I told her the tylenol is not working for me, it does nothing when I have a headache. I asked her if I could take motrin since so many of you said your doctors said it wasn't a problem. Get this, she says "Motrin erodes the band!" So to all of you out there taking it be warned. She gave me a prescription of another tylenol based medicine for my migraines with is stronger hopefully that works. She tried to pass off tylenol with codine but I told her my students probably would prefer a teacher who is awake.

Now for the second thing I found out. As I am going to check out I said, I don't want to make a new appt I think this is the fill I am going to be good at. I mean I am at 9 already. She says actually at 10. OMG, when did this happen how can I be at 10! My band only holds 11 right?

She says well the manufacturer says 11 but we can get up to 23 cc's in your band! 23 cc's that is like crazy you wouldn't be able to swallow a thing with that much in your band. And wouldn't you be scared it would pop like if you put your seat belt on too tight? Can't believe it.

So there is good news and bad new with this fill.
The bad news I think I am going to need to get an unfill if things don't get better. I am on liquids for 2 days and yesterday I took a large sip of a shake and threw it up. Maybe if I drank it slower i would have gone down but that is not good. For the rest of the day I just had crystal light and decaf coffee. We will see today if liquids mainly shakes go down better.

The good news is I am not hungry at all! I mean like nothing. For someone who had maybe 200 calories total yesterday I should be starving but I feel like Calista Flockhart, not a care in the world about eating. So nice for a change.

Will keep you posted ladies, I should be in the 1o0's by tomorrow with two days of liquids easy.

just another day trying to figure things out

So if you recall from yesterday i realized I could never eat bread again and I think I came to terms with that. Today we went to the mall and I had a fantastic salad from Saladworks which is not what I normally get when I go there. Normally I would have gotten the chicken terrayki with extra sauce. But you know rice is out, and obviously if I can't eat bread Subway won't work either.
Feeling pretty good about that kept walking in the mall and had a coupon for a free pretzel from Aunt Annies which of course I had to redeem. I gave most of it to my kids but on the way to the car I was like "It's not really bread I can have a little piece" And I proceeded to eat a bite. and I chewed, and chewed, and was worried, and chewed till it was almost a paste in my mouth and I thought to myself. Is it really worth it? Am I really enjoying this pretzel with the fear and the work I have to go through. You can't even taste it after chewing it a million times, so why even bother having it at all. I just don't think it is worth it.

But in other news I come home and there are left over cookies I made and I have been eating them so much the past few days. Every single time I walk by them I pick one up and eat it. And every time I eat one, I want another and another. Yesterday I had 6. That is right I had 6 cookies. Which is why I haven't had cookies in my house since I got banded in December. If I have cookies I eat them and I just can't stop, it is just sad. But the thought of throwing them away is painful to me. So they sit on the counter calling out my name. Today I had 4, down from 6 as long as I don't grab another on my way to bed. What I have learned is some foods like cookies I still feel like I have no control over. And this is why I know I needed the band. I need something to tell me when I am done. I have never been able to stop eating. Even as a toddler I remember my mom telling me that a babysitter once called her and asked "Do I stop feeding her when I think she is full or when she thinks she is full?" Maybe it is something you are born with? Or born without? I don't know but I just have never felt like I had control over food or had a full feeling until I got the band. That is why it is life changing for me. To feel full and leave a plate that still has bites left on it is something I am not used to. And it still is hard. I feel like I should be shipping my plate to a starving child somewhere after all the times my mom said I had to finish because there were starving people that would love to have what I am wasting.

Oh well, have a great holiday weekend everyone. Stay away from the potato salad- I got way stuck on that a few months ago.

oops I did it again

Yes I had a little throw up incident today but before I tell you how that came to be lets just rewind the what was my life like a year ago first.

Last summer and the summer before about three times a week I would go to the library with my kids then go directly to the bakery. I would order a turkey and cheese sandwich on fresh rye bread get two cookies for the kids and then proceed to pick up a few baked goods for myself. My normal order was an almond croissant, a cream cheese turnover, and maybe an elephant ear for good luck. And yes I would eat it all. Not at one time, but most surely before my husband came home to not leave any evidence. But it was only a few times a week, and I couldn't do it during the school year since they close at 3. So it was like not a big thing right? Looking back it does seem a little excessive. Ok maybe a lot excessive. But I think what happens when you constantly eat more than the norm, your norm becomes normal. Right?

Anywhoo, so flash forward back to the present. We went to the library and for the first time this summer went to the bakery. I got a cookie for each kid, ordered my turkey and cheese sandwich on rye and decided to get just one cookie for myself. No croissant, no eclair, no cream cheese turnover, and no elephant ear. I was patting myself on the back all the way to the car. Boy look how far I came, I said to myself. You should be proud of yourself I say. This is what a normal person would eat I say.

So I am in the car the kids are eating their cookies and I bust open the sandwich. I take three bites and ooh can I feel it. It is right there, tight, just pain. I put the sandwich down and knew I was done. Oh but the pain.

A couple minutes pass and then the spit in my mouth starts. I was like oh boy we might have a problem here. Do I pull over, will it pass? I decide to get a bag ready just in case. And then before I could pull over, I was at a light though, I threw up in the bag. It was more like a productive burp I guess. Just a little teaspoon or so of throw up, mostly spit.

So there you have it, I know what this means. I must now get rid of eating bread. This is difficult for me since my life sort of consisted mostly of bread, bread products, and their close relatives. I would have called myself a carbeterian. Cause I mostly ate just carbs. But now the time has come to leave the loaf on the shelf. Push the bread basket back, and leave it to those that are not banded. I am done with it, because I think throwing up in front of my friends might not be a good thing.

things my doctor told me

It seems like each gastric surgeon tells their patients something different and I thought maybe we should compare. Below are things my doctor told me to do or not to do after the band.
1. Wait for 30 minutes to drink before or after a meal.(I just wait 30 minutes after a meal)
2. Don't take any pain reliever other than tylenol for the rest of your life.
3. No more coffee just decaf (suppose to be an appetite stimulant)
4. No more soda
5. Get 60 - 65 grams of protein a day
6. Get 64 ounces of water/crystal light a day
7. No straws ( I personally hate this rule and would like to formally object)
8. eat protein first
9. limit starches
10. take vitamins, vitamin D and caltrate daily

Did I miss any? Are your rules like the ones I got from my doctor?

to tell or not to tell that is the question

Well my last day of school has passed so I don't really have anyone asking me how I lost the weight now. I have about 8 weeks off which I had the goal of losing another 13 pounds. Maybe once my terrible horrible no good very bad sun burn goes away I can think of putting my butt on my bike I bought.
Anywhooo... a lot of people ask me how I lost the weight and I normally just say oh you know I am on the donut wagon. No donuts for me anymore. Because for me when you give me a donut it is like the book when you give a mouse a cookie. When I eat a donut for breakfast, I might as well have another one with my large coffee. Then for snack I should have a bag of m&m's and a diet coke. And when lunch time comes you might as well have a chalupa since you have already screwed up the day. And what goes best with a chalupa but a taco supreme and bag of cinnamin twists. Well now its almost dinner and you can't go wrong with a sub from subway. And since Dairy Queen left the light on for me, might as well pick a blizzard up on the way home.

Now of course I don't say all that, I normally just say "Just trying not to eat everything that comes in front of my face, and exercising a little" But then I start to wonder do they think I had surgery? And then when an overweight person asks me I want to scream from the mountain tops "I had lap band and it is the best thing I did, you could be healthy too" But then what if they tell some skinny person who thinks I took the easy way out.

So for the most part like I said I don't tell anyone because I am eating less, and making better decisions, and taking my gps off locating all the taco bells' in the tri-state area. But is that lying? I don't think so.

What do you do for pain?

Isn't it amazing what causes pain and what doesn't? I had a pretzel stick and I thought I swallowed a cup of sand. I had three bites of a breakfast burrito around 9:30 felt like a small child was stuck inside my breast bone. But a small fries, or a bag of cheetos no problem there. So crazy.

These past few days I have been in Puerto Rico and it was hard to know how many calories or protein I was eating. I did a few salads, I brought some protein bars, and protein chips. Of course I couldn't have any shakes so i am sure I was under my 60 grams. I also managed to have a migrane while I was there and got sea sick so I was puking a tad. I thought man I am going to come home and be in the ones. Even my husband was like you are going to lose weight you really haven't beeneating much. So why do I come home and see the scale at 203 two pounds more than what I left! Is there weight gain caused from being in on an airplane? Very disapointing.

On the issue of taking pain medications. My doctor said you can only take tylenol from now on, which does nothing to help my headaches. Does anyone out there take anything else? Also I can still swallow a pill fine but I know everything said to chop it up and put it in applesauce or something. I did throw up after taking the tylenol once and I don't know if that had anything to do with me swallowing them or just because I was already sick.

I tossed my cookies, I mean pizza

Well I had my first experience with throwing up after eating too much. Let me explain. We had our end of year luncheon, you know the one where there is food from one end of the world to the other. The kind of lunch where there is nothing green in site. The kind of lunch with 15 or 20 desserts to choose from. The kind of lunch where you fill your plate to the brim, go back some more and then take a plate home which you eat soon after you walk in the door.
So I knew I couldn't go all out like I used to, nor did I have the desire but I did want to partake in some of the festivities.

I started with a slice of pizza and a 1/4 of a tuna hoagie (aka sub). I ate the pizza minus the thick crust on the end. Feeling just fine I went on to eat the tuna with a fork from the sandwich. I didn't dig into the bread at all. I of course had no soda although there were at least 7 bottles of diet coke which were looking at me with loving memories. Then I had a scoop of canoli filling. Oh my lord I almost fell to my knees it was so good. After I ate all that I stopped and did feel some tightness in my chest. This was around 11:30. I was pretty proud of myself. Not an ideal meal, but no where near what I would have eaten on any other buffet table.
At 3:00 I went home and was forced to take a left over pizza with me. I said well it has been a few hours might as well have another slice. So I did, and I enjoyed it just the same. Still no crust, and I did throw a little piece to the dog. But this time I felt a lot of tightness in my chest. I knew I couldn't eat anymore I mean I was in pain. It feels like I don't have full breath capacity, it just is right in between my boobs and I guess i could describe it as someone squeezing my lungs from the inside.
Well at 4:30 the pizza box was still there, and guess what I did. I pulled off the bottom triangle and popped that sucker right in my mouth. I chewed, swallowed, and felt a little tight. Then I took just one more bite for the road.
I went outside to get in the car, and then the pain came. Lots of tightness, so much more than before. I leaned over to see if that would loosen up the pizza with no luck. Instead of sitting in the car I went outside the garage and spit a couple times. I had so much spit in my mouth and the pain was more intense. After waiting a few more minutes I leaned over again and spit out a little more. Still no relief. Then I got the urge to puke. I ran inside and threw up just a little. Like a dollop of undigested pizza. And although I didn't enjoy the experience I felt such relief. The pressure and tightness was gone. It put a little fear back in me and gave me a wake up call that I need to stop eating so much.
I mean when I have something from a restaurant in my house I take a pick at it every time I walk by. When I have a cake in my house I would cut a sliver off hoping no one would realize that there was half the cake gone. So since my surgery I have done a pretty good job keeping that kind of stuff out of the house. Well today it was here and I went back to old habits. I hope this incident helps me remember I don't need to, nor should I be picking at food all day long no matter how good it was.

The surgery is the easy part it is getting past your life long habits that is still a struggle.

I went shopping sort of

Went out shopping and tried on a pair of 16 bermuda shorts and capris. Guess what they fit. Now you might be able to see my panty line, and every dot of cellulite on my legs and butt, but they fit. I mean they buttoned, and went above my knees.
Needless to say I didn't buy them because I didn't want to gross out my colleagues but gosh darn it if I didn't call that a victory i don't know what is.
Weird thing is, I have a pair of 18's in my closet that are still at least an inch away from being able to button. What is up with that?

how many times do you weigh each day?

Ok let's be honest here, how many times a day do you jump on the scale. When I first got banded it was probably 9 or 10 times a day. I would weigh myself first thing in the morning, after soup, after a poop, in the middle of the night, basically any time I walked in the vicinity of the scale. I just wanted instant results.
Now I don't weigh myself quite so much but I do weigh often. First thing in the morning, and when I come home from work, and then right before I go to bed. I have figured out I am exactly 2 pounds lighter in the morning than I am at night. And my weight does fluctuate up and down a pound every other day or so. Why I don't know, and it is frustrating.
I don't know if the scale motivates me to do better or deters me from working harder. I think I am going to take a week off from the scale and see if that makes any difference. I mean I think it is like the saying a watched pot never boils. A watched scale never makes drastic moves.
How often do you weigh yourself?

How great are these? Let me count the ways.

So as any food addict knows we are always looking for the best food. Before the band my search for the best food would be found by going to lots of different restaurants and scouring the web for new dessert recipes. After the band I am in search of food I can eat that will get me closer to my goal of 175. I came across these protein bars at Target. They cost 3.99 for I think 6 bars and they are delicious! The one I am holding is mint which is good but my ultimate favorite is Peanut butter. Can you say Reece's peanut butter cup? Because that is what they taste like. There is no gritty taste or fake chocolate taste either. Now you do have to chew it doesn't melt in your mouth but don't we want to chew?
It has 14 grams of protein and I think 200 calories all of which are totally worth it.
They also have a graham cracker one which is ok.
Before I found these I was buying protein bars through Bariatric Choice for 9.99 a box. These taste just as good if not better and cost much less.

I have found that if I have a bar in between lunch and dinner I don't do stupid snacking. Sometimes I need it after lunch as my dessert. Just to have something sweet.

who's fruity?

One thing I have never been is a fruit eater. My fruit repertoire consists of bananas and the occasional apple. I have tried so much fruit at various times in my life and I just really don't like it. Peaches are furry, cantaloupe is mushy, and watermelon is just too watery. So what I do to get a little bit of fruit in is use frozen fruit in my protein shakes. Here is a bag I found at Walmart for like 6.00. It is pretty good it seems like it makes my shakes taste different each time since I always get a different mixture of the fruit.
When I first started doing shakes I did frozen strawberries, then a frozen berry mixture. Although it was good the frozen berries had soo many seeds in it. I felt like I was doing a commercial for Polident. Remember the commercial for dentures where they were always complaining about he seeds getting stuck in their teeth.
For a few weeks I did frozen blueberries until I realized I had been going around all morning with bits of black blueberry skin stuck in my teeth all day.
For now I am good with the mixture. I put about a cup of fruit, a scoop of protein powder, skim milk and a teaspoon of sugar. You know a teaspoon of sugar helps the medicine go down, at least that is what Mary Poppins always said.

Till next time.

I don't get it

So like I said this week I have felt restriction. Let me share with you my experiences on what has caused me to get a severe tightness or being stuck.
A small quartered potato from potato salad.
A bite of turkey sausage, egg white and half of a bagel sandwich.
A piece of cheese.
A bite of cake. ( I know I normally don't have it in the house but it was someones birthday this week)
Three bites of a turkey burger.
What I don't get is at other times during the week these things gave me no trouble. Does that mean I ate faster when I got stuck? I don't think so.
What I did find out is drinking to get relief does not work. In fact I think it makes it more painful. But that is just me.
My worst episode was the potato. I spent ten minutes at my parents house spitting in the toilet. You know how right before you throw up you get a lot of spit in your mouth, well that was me. Thankfully I didn't throw up but I did have tons of spit. My doctor said that is the way or your body trying to dislodge the food by lubricating your esophagus. I did get some relief when leaning over the toilet, maybe a different angle helps? I don't know.

You would have thought I would have lost a ton of weight since I have this restriction now, but no. I lost 2 pounds since when I got my fill almost 2 weeks ago. I will say there has been almost no real exercise this week, and my food choices have not been the best. But I also had nothing but shakes this week for breakfast and have always gotten my 60 grams in each day because of that. One thing I did a lot of this week is grab handfuls of cereal to get that sweet taste in my mouth after dinner. I ran out of my protein bars and this was what I did to compensate for not having something sweet. And then of course there was the cake. I guess when writing it down I understand why I didn't lose more, but in theory it would have been nice to see something different on the scale.

Houston, we have restriction!

For the first time I can say I have restriction. Yes that last fill certainly did something.
On Friday I was on mushy food so nothing that day. Saturday I wake up made myself some eggs and turkey sausage. I had maybe 2 bites of my eggs and felt like someone stuck a knife in between my boobs. I waited a minute took a little drink which I never do anymore when eating and felt no relief. So I spent the next 10 minutes walking around my dining room table beating on my chest trying to produce a burp. It was painful and scary. Needless to say that was the end of breakfast. I was fine for lunch but dinner was the same. And let me tell you when I had a piece of cheese, omg! I chewed really slow and my last bite I guess I didn't do such a great job. I almost fell to my knees it hurt so much. But 10 minutes later I was fine. My nose started to run and I did have quite a bit of spit in my mouth but I didn't throw up.

For the last few days I have decided a few things. One it is not worth the risk of feeling that way at breakfast. I have read enough blogs and posts from lapbandtalk.com that people are tighter in the morning. So I am just going to drink shakes for breakfast for a while. When I do I always hit my 60 grams of protein anyway. And second I started thinking that maybe food isn't going to be fun much longer. I mean if this is what is going to happen when I eat why even risk it. Which is good. I don't want food to be fun anymore, I don't want to think about all the things I could be eating anymore. Which I have noticed a big difference in, I don't think about food all the time, or where I can stop on the way home to pick up a quick snack. But when food is in front of me, I still struggle with stopping or even starting to eat it. With restriction maybe I won't have to wrestle with that anymore.

I did lose a few more pounds, but then today I bought a bag of m&m's and ate them all. No restriction there, and I just had some popcorn. I know why I ate more than normal today. I am stressed and wrestling with decisions about home, work and finishing my masters. And of course when stress pops up, I pop into the kitchen. It is a long struggle to beat this.

In other news, did you see the girl that had gastric bypass gained like most of her weight back? She has her own show now and was in people magazine. She was in that group of three girls back years ago. Can't think of her name. I just couldn't believe it. Did she stretch her stomach? That is one reason I opted for the band, I figured if I ever got out of control someone could just tighten me up and put me back on track.

Till next time my friends. ...