Just how much have I lost?

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

went to the doctor

Called the doctor and told her my issues. She is great. She put me on topamax? I think is the name. I will take it twice a day as prevention. She even called the pharmacy to see if it was small enough to swallow and if I could sprinkle the capsule if I couldn't get it down.
She was impressed with my weight loss since she has not seen me since before i had it done.
According to her scale I am down 68 pounds. Not as nice as I would have hoped. I mean when I weigh myself I am butt naked before eating anything. This was at the end of the day and fully clothed so I weighed 184. I didn't like that number one bit!

Yesterday I walked for 30 minutes and sweated like crazy. Today it is just too hot to go out so I put dancing on the Wii and getting ready to hit it in a few minutes. I have to get active since eating seems not to be working for me.

How many of you work out consistantly? How and when do you do it? The morning I am too tired to get out of bed before 5:30 and then when I come home it is like straight into mom duty and I am asleep by 9:30.
Do tell I need help, inspiration and motivation.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

these migranes are the worst

Ever since I can remember I have gotten migraines. Well about 2 years ago my doctor says take Advil during your period and then you won't get them. And don't you know she was right. However since I got the band and they said no Advil or Motrin only Tylenol I can't take anything until after I get one. Which means every month after my period I get a killer headache. I was able to get a prescription to take when they hit but it only works if I take it as soon as I get it.
Well yesterday we went on a field trip and I got one. I didn't have my meds. Then we got on a bus packed with 2nd graders with no air. I thought I was going to die. It went from a headache to a migraine to something so much worse in 20 minutes.
When we got back to school I had to lay down. I knew I couldn't take anything because I could just feel me getting ready to throw up. Laying in the nurses office with kids coming in saying hi was not fun. I texted my husband to come pick me up because it hurt so bad.
So then picture me and my trashcan outside the school throwing up. Then all the way home I threw up. My head felt like it was going to explode. I took my medicine and threw it up.
This continued for hours until my husband says I am taking you to the hospital.
We drove there i and the line was out the door. I guess people got started early on their memorial day weekend. I said no way am I sitting in there for hours throwing up in a bucket for 5 hours.
We went home and I made it through. Finally at 10:30 at night I felt relief.

All I know is I can't continue like this. First thing Monday morning I am calling my doctor to discuss my options. This is probably my biggest issue with having the band.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

down a few

down to 179.
been eating my peanuts with chocolate chips to get my cravings out.
had tuna for lunch today.
Been drinking much more water.
last night I had a little sliver of brownie and a swig of milk. 2 seconds later i was in the bathroom throwing up. I just can't drink after I eat ever. One day I will learn.

Still haven't exercised yet, that too will come.
Oprah told me I am worthy of happiness. I need to put my positive energy into this. :)

Saturday, May 21, 2011

I'm blaming it on Aunt Flow

Yesterday I was 178.7 this morning I wake up and am 181.5. what the hell! How does that happen? And for the last two days I was so good. Ok not so good but a lot better than what I have been. I had my peanuts, cheerios, and chocolate chips as a snack between breakfast and lunch, and lunch and dinner. then I stopped eating at 7. No exercise but I did think about it.

Anyway I said well Aunt Flow is here I will blame it on her but overnight that is just crazy. And what did that motivate me to do today? Eat. I have absolutely no sense, none. I made cookies which was my first mistake I guess. I made it for my kids to be able to sell at our yard sale. Problem is the cookies never made it to the yard sale. My husband never took them out. ( I was yard saleing at other developments) So the cookies stayed in the house and many were eaten by me. I also had a handful of triscuts and maybe 20 cheetos, and a slice of danish. Terrible!

But tomorrow is yet another day and I am taking all the cookies to sunday school so there will be none left. And I have vowed to start exercising Monday. But I swear if I get on the scale and it is more than 181 a number I never thought I would see again I will hurt somebody.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

met another bandster

Well last night I went to a retiirement dinner for a friend of mine and I saw another woman who looked normal. By normal I mean not overweight or flabby skin hanging anywhere. I then found out her name and knew she was the woman my friend mentioned that had a band.
After the dinner I went over to her and introduced myself and asked her if she had the band. She said hers was done in march of last year. Faith we will call her lost 155 pounds. So let us review. faith had a band a little over a year ago and lost 155 pounds! She looks great, and says she wears a size 10.
Then I started to do a little math. If she weighed 320 pounds and lost 155 pounds that would put her at 170 right? Only 5 pounds less than me yet I thought she looked so much thinner than I did.
I also asked her what she did and how much she had in her band. This is what Faith told me.
She has 3 cc's in her band - i have 10!
She walks 1 1/4 mile a day during the week, and then 1 1/4 mile twice on Saturdays and Sunday. she just walks that's it. --- I haven't exercised for months.
She keeps track of her protein and gets 60 grams a day. --- I haven't in months.
For snacks she packs peanuts and chocolate chips about a cup of peanuts to keep her sweet and salty cravings down. ----- I just eat everything lately.
She drinks a ton of water --- I probably get 16 ounces in a day not coutning my coffee.

What this means is that i have fallen off the wagon and she has stayed on and looks great.
She inspired me and I got peanuts with chocolate chips for my snack today. I had eggs with turkey and cheese for lunch.
I counted my protein today.
Then dinner came and we had pizza I had 2 1/2 slices, and 4 cookies. Yikes.
But I did do better than what I have been and I drank 36 ounces of water, which is also better.

I have resolved I am going to do better. I worked too hard to get this close to what I want to look like and then quit because of my laziness.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

i need help

Well I lost three of the 4 pounds I gained. then I got on the scale today and I gained them all back. and I know why. It could be the 17 handfulls of chow mein noodles I had at
school. Or maybe it was the cookies and cream icecream I had with hot fudge. maybe it was the hotdog, the 50 chips and dip, or 2 bowls of cereal, or 4 cookies.
Why I eat when i know I shouldn't I don't understand. I guess I could get another fill but I think I need some serious therapy. Anybody know where to find a good shrink?

Monday, May 9, 2011

the good the bad and the pounds

The good - I had a fantastic 4 days with just my hubby and no kids so I could truly relax
The bad - When hiking the 7 miles on a moutain trail I hurt my ankles and it is painful to walk
The ugly- I gained 4 pounds in those 4 days. Although I didn't feel like I ate a lot I obviously ate too much bad food. Every morning I bought 2 chocolate croissants and throughout the day I ate them both. I am sure that is worth at least 2000 calories. I also ate a bag of sweedish fish and half a bag of cheetos.
Now how long will it take for me to lose it. I wanted to work out today but my ankles are still killing me. So walking or jogging is so out of the question. I did really good today that is until I did bad. I had coffee like normal, then a salad with chicken for lunch. I bought my friend a donut today and since she didn't come to work I ate it. For dinner I just ate a bowl of cereal and a bowl of popcorn. If I keep my mouth shut the rest of the night I won't feel terrible.
I need to go to bed early otherwise I know I will be eating more.

Friday, May 6, 2011

first time

I bought a dress, in fact I bought 2.... and I wore it last night. (size 14 thank you very much) I did put on a pair of spanx like shorts under it but I wore a dress. For the first time in probably 14 years I wore one and heels. I felt good. I was out with my husband at a banquet for his company and I felt lke I belonged. Last year or was it two years ago I went I wore capris and a shirt and look like a casual bum. But now I was dressed like everyone else and was not self consious.
Today we went out for lunch and I literally had 3 bites of my salad and 7 bites of my ravoli. I brought the rest back to the hotel and it will be my dinner. Acutally just the salad the chicken and ravoli my husband will eat.
Tomorrow we are going to take a 4 mile hike which I think should be fun. One day when I acutally have a camera I will post pics.
Did I tell you I am wearing the same bra size I wore back in high school a 38C. This is down from a 42 DDD. I would love to lose 10 more pounds but since I am not really doing anything to make a change I am pretty sure I will stay at this weight for a while. And guess what I am ok with that. I look normal and can wear clothes that I feel good in.